Dear Mom, Happy Birthday, mamadear, on what would have been your 69th. I’m sitting here about to watch an Agatha Christie movie, whom you loved, eating beets then pecan shortbread, which you loved (as do I), end-of-week tired from work you would have been so happy to know I was
Divergent? Or Derailed?
What do you do when you fall short of a goal? How do you Define it? Is it a Divergence? Or a Derailing? Are you more motivated with humongous, “unrealistic” goals? Or small steps? I am slowly figuring out how I work best. I keep thinking that making big goals
Call Me! It’s California!
T-Mobile thinks I’m in Mexico. Last night, as I arrived at the unexpected gift of two nights in a condo on the beach, my phone pinged. I wondered who might be texting so late and looked to find T-Mobile’s cheerful message: “Welcome to Mexico! Texts are $.50 and calls are
My Mother’s Words to Me, Through Me
The last week or two, a sort of time warp has wrapped every moment in as intense a grief and dark a depression as just after my mother and sister-in-law died a year and two months ago. It’s as though some parts of my mind and body have moved through
Lists and Christmas: The One Thing I Want for Christmas
My childhood Christmas lists were a work of art. Crafted from hours with my nose in the Sears catalog, the key at the top was essential. Need Very Badly = NVB. Need = N. Want = W. Want Very Much = WVM. Each item (often topping 100) was coded, with its
My Mother’s Ring
Right now, I am standing at a coffee shop, trying to write about my mom, for you, for myself, to honor her today. She died at about 2:30 a.m. on December 4th a year ago. Tomorrow, I will tell you more about those last days. For this day, I have
The Somersaulted Rant of Sheisse (Thank You)
This whole thing started with “Sheisse!” (“shit” in German) And I felt justified in saying it, too. Out loud, even! For Stuff has gone Wrong all day. Broken dishes, broken wifi, broken me…ah, there’s one part of it. Only in the last few days has my mom felt…gone gone, physically
The Dream Life
It just hit me. I’m living my dream life. Do I mean everything is perfect? Nope. That I have all I want? Nay. Then how? Well, it has to do with cooking. When people ask me what I “do,” I say, “I’m an Artist.” And then they ask which medium,
How Today is Like Homemade Butter
Today feels like butter. Well, like making butter…deep, emotional, existential conversations bubbling up and coalescing from what seemed like milk-plain, catch-up chats. I’ve been getting raw milk from the amazing folks at Larga Vista Ranch for a while now, and though it is for my children, usually I end up
Finally, a Feminist
This is not complete. It is not well-thought-out. Not planned. Not really even edited. But it is me, now. I have more to say on this, but that will come. Love to you all (female and male). 🙂 Jene’